We're back from my dad's cabin upstate, and I'm trying to get a lot done this week so I can float in the pond when we're back there again next week!
A daily gratitude practice is like floating in a cool, clear pond of oxytocin. If I float long enough, maybe I’ll become a sponge.
How's your summer so far? 😎
I asked Ocean's dentist (who I need to write a blog post about because he's the Besel van der Kolk of pediatric dentistry).
He replied as many parents do:
"My kids are in camp, and I'm working. That's it."
I know this business-as-usual experience of summer is typical, and felt a tiny twinge of guilt thinking about the way I've orchestrated this summer... and then I let that shit go (especially when I saw the bill!)
Our family is NOT typical. We need to chill this summer, and I'm grateful that we can.
There's lots of research on the benefits of gratitude to saturate our nervous systems with the hormone oxytocin, strengthening the neural pathways our brains create as we experience positive feelings.
That's why the one new habit I started this month is a gratitude journal.
I know, it's hokey! Will you join me?
I'm writing one page a day. Yay micro-habits!
FWIW: on day 2 I forgot. On day 3 I gave myself grace and began again. Not a big deal, but I feel I need to say it because I know a lot of people treat daily practices as an appetizer for a huge portion of self-criticism.
We're not doing that, right?
A daily gratitude practice is like floating in a cool, clear pond of oxytocin. If I float long enough, maybe I’ll become a sponge.
Will you join me?
Comment with one thing you're grateful for.
(In case you're imagining us checking out completely for 2 months, we parents ARE working, and our kid IS in camp, just not as much of either.)
I just came across something I wrote a few months ago. It sounds so good, but I'm wondering how true it was when I wrote it:
"I'm soaking up pleasure like a sponge, and it's sustaining me."
I SO want this to be true, but there are obstacles, even in my privileged, carefully curated life. The main one I overcome daily is anxiety. The hypervigilance my body learned as a child needs consistent reassurance. So, daily practices are important to me - and they might help you feel calmer too.
Especially if your body holds tension in an effort to protect you, but that leads to chronic stress, pain, and exhaustion, it's just not so simple as soaking up pleasure like a sponge. Most days I feel more like a nonstick pan than a sponge. I know I'm not alone. Did you know 30% of Americans experience anxiety that's so intense or persistent that it qualifies as a disorder?
My passion is sharing the practices that have helped me to regulate my nervous system so I can feel safe enough to soak up pleasure, and create positive change, despite my anxiety.
I've learned lots of ways we can saturate our nervous systems with the hormone oxytocin, and encourage neural pathways of love and connection.
So if someone asks me to talk about self-regulation, the answer is YES! That's why I'm excited about a talk I'm preparing for a new summit that will help you return your focus to the things you love. Before we can let in what we love, we need to feel safe enough to open up.
That's where you come in. I need your help with this project:
What helps you feel safer?
It can be, and often is, the simplest thing.
Please leave a comment (or reply to email).
Ah. I have written A LOT in my own journals about how to calm my anxiety. In no particular order: soothing music, journaling, chocolate, gardening, engaging podcasts/books/movies (though they must be cheerful/no drama) playing with children or pets, working on a meaningful project.